by Debbie Wicker, BCCC
We are continuing our series on the Ten Commandments, and we have now reached the Sixth Commandment.
“Thou shalt not kill.”
— Exodus 20:13, KJV
I usually use the NIV translation of the Bible, but sometimes I simply love the King James Version. There is something especially powerful about the words “Thou shalt not” when we are talking about something as serious as murder.
At first glance, the Sixth Commandment seems simple: Do not kill another person.
But when Jesus explains this commandment during His Sermon on the Mount, He shows us that God is concerned about more than the physical act of murder. He is also concerned about what happens inside our hearts.
Jesus Takes the Sixth Commandment Deeper
Jesus says:
“You have heard that it was said to the people long ago, ‘You shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to judgment.’ But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will be subject to judgment.”
— Matthew 5:21–22, NIV
Jesus then warns against insulting, humiliating, and treating another person with contempt.
He continues:
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them.”
— Matthew 5:23–24, NIV
Why would Jesus connect murder, anger, insults, conflict, and reconciliation?
I believe He is showing us something important about the human heart.
Murder does not begin with the physical act. Before someone harms another person, there may be anger, hatred, resentment, contempt, or a desire for revenge.
Jesus is warning us about the path that destructive anger can take.
Anger Can Become Destructive
We all experience anger. Being angry is not automatically sinful. Sometimes anger alerts us that something is wrong or that an injustice has occurred.
The danger comes when anger is allowed to grow into hatred, bitterness, contempt, or revenge.
When we continually rehearse what someone has done to us, our anger can become increasingly powerful. Instead of seeking a healthy resolution, we can begin wanting the other person to suffer.
Jesus calls us to interrupt that process.
He tells us to seek reconciliation and settle conflicts rather than continually feeding our anger.
This can be extremely difficult.
Think about contentious divorces, custody disputes, family conflicts, business disagreements, or lawsuits. When people feel deeply wronged, emotions can become intense. Anger can turn into rage, and rage can lead people to make destructive choices.
The Sixth Commandment reminds us that human life is sacred and that we should not allow hatred and vengeance to take control of our hearts.
We Are Not Called to Take Vengeance
The Bible repeatedly teaches that vengeance belongs to God.
Paul writes:
“Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath.”
— Romans 12:19, NIV
This does not mean that Christians should ignore injustice, refuse to protect themselves, or avoid legitimate legal action.
We can seek justice through appropriate authorities while still refusing to let hatred and revenge control us.
There is an important difference between seeking justice and seeking vengeance.
Justice seeks what is right.
Vengeance seeks to make someone suffer because we are angry.
When we place vengeance in God’s hands, we acknowledge that God sees the entire situation. He knows what happened, what motivated each person, what we don’t know, and what consequences are appropriate.
God is loving, but He is also just.
We don’t have to carry the responsibility of being the ultimate judge of another person.
Letting Go of Vengeance Is HARD
Letting go of vengeance is not easy when we or someone we love has been seriously harmed.
My husband and I experienced this personally when we were sued by a very wealthy man. We believed the lawsuit was frivolous and deeply unfair. We defended ourselves, but the legal dispute took seven years to resolve.
Seven years is a long time to live with an unresolved conflict.
It would have been easy to allow anger and bitterness to consume us.
Instead, we worked toward forgiveness and eventually were able to move forward with our lives.
Forgiveness did not mean pretending that nothing happened. It did not mean that we believed the situation was fair. And it did not mean that we stopped defending ourselves.
It meant that we chose not to make anger and vengeance the center of our lives.
We trusted that God knew the entire situation and that His justice was greater than ours.
That decision brought us tremendous peace.
What the Sixth Commandment Can Teach Us Today
“Thou shalt not kill” is obviously a command against murder.
But Jesus helps us see that the commandment also challenges us to examine what is happening inside our hearts.
Are we holding onto hatred?
Are we consumed by resentment?
Are we constantly replaying what someone has done to us?
Are we seeking justice—or are we secretly seeking revenge?
Are we allowing anger to control our thoughts and actions?
The answer will not always be easy.
Sometimes we genuinely have been wronged. Sometimes people have done terrible things to us or to people we love. The Christian response is not to deny that wrong occurred.
Instead, we are called to turn toward God rather than allowing vengeance to destroy us.
So, the Next Time You Feel Wronged, Turn to God
The Sixth Commandment reminds us that human life matters deeply to God.
Jesus takes that commandment even further by challenging us to examine the anger and contempt that can grow within us.
When you feel deeply wronged, remember that you don’t have to carry the burden of vengeance yourself.
Seek appropriate justice when necessary. Set healthy boundaries. Protect yourself and others when needed.
But then give the desire for revenge to God.
God sees what we cannot see. God knows what we do not know. And God is ultimately just.
When we trust Him with vengeance, we can begin to let go of the anger, rage, and bitterness that can destroy our own peace.
That may be one of the greatest gifts of the Sixth Commandment:
It moves us away from hatred and vengeance and toward God.
About the Author
Debbie Wicker is a Board Certified Christian Counselor who brings a thoughtful mental health perspective to the study of the Bible. With more than 15 years of counseling experience, Debbie helps individuals understand Scripture not only spiritually, but emotionally and psychologically as well.
Before entering counseling, Debbie was a partner in a Big 8 public accounting firm, where she built a successful career in management consulting. After a mid-life career change, she felt called to integrate faith and mental health — equipping others to grow spiritually while addressing real-life struggles with wisdom and compassion.
Through the-Bible.net, Debbie writes to help readers better understand God’s Word, human nature, and the transforming power of Christ.